It was exhausting. I was worn completely out and I hadn’t done hardly anything at all. I had spent a good portion of the day just walking around…. going room to room…. thinking about things that I remember happening in each one… watching sports with dad back in the den, the occasional sandwich with mom, dad and my sister in the kitchen, Christmas days in the living room and the occasional holiday meal in the dining room. I even spent time down in the garage thinking about the time I spent down there messing with bikes and doing laundry (it’s where the washer and dryer are located… what can I say).
As I mentioned yesterday, I ended this final visit by sitting in the swing in the front yard. As I was driving away, I just couldn’t leave. I have no idea when I would be back again… if ever… and the memories weren’t restricted to my mom and dad’s house. I have memories all over the town. So I headed back into town and down Broad St…. by my grandmother’s houses…
They looked a little more run down than I remember seeing them but I could still see my grandparents on both porches… and for a moment smell the smells of wonderful foods once again filling the air. And with each breath and each scene my heart grew heavier and heavier with sadness.
I decided I couldn’t take the sadness any more…. so I headed to the one place where I always found comfort…. I headed to the river. There is always something about the river that just calms me down… just like the beach… it brings things back into perspective for me and creates a serenity I don’t find anywhere else.